Advice Column: Passive Aggressive

Hey J-Wunder,

I hate when people are passive aggressive on Facebook. It's like why do you make your posts about someone who is on your friends list, if you don't like the bastard then defriend them. Quit putting your friend drama on your status. I mean I thought I graduated HS 16 years ago (shut up). I mean damn, it's no longer cute to have drama with your BFF when you are in your 30's people! And no one wants to hear about your damn BFF drama, if they do they are just as ghetto as you! Shoot! Im fired up! Hate that shit though, when someone pisses me off I hit delete and block!!!

Respectfully,
Drama Free




Dear Drama Free,

I think you hit the nail on the head my friend. There is nothing worse when some dumbass tries to put their "friend" on blast. I could give two shits what your drama entails. Although, being a blogger, I kinda do care because your drama is what myself and others live for, bitches! But I digress...

A majority of the drama I see, are usually about how someone got mad about something from someone who said this about that person, who said their friends friend who is really dating their boyfriend's brother, but not really, blah, blah fucking blah, better watch their back (or some type of bullshit like that). As a lot of you are re-reading that last part 10 times over, that's how fucked up and confusing shit can get with the bullshit drama...amiright? None of the shit makes any fucking sense and sounds like a Chinese dude and a homeboy from Sudan trying to talk to one another over India food.

NEWS FLASH: Grow the fuck up people.

AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT!!!!!

If you have shit to say, say it to their face and not to the public (because that's what your intent is...to make your friend look stupid, right?). Myself as well as the rest of your FB friends don't care about you and your BFF's goddamn ordeal. Delete, Delete, Delete, if you hate this person. Then find them and karate chop the fuck out of their throat. Oh wait...what the hell am I saying? There's a good chance you'll kiss each others ass an hour later and everything will be all good, right? Back to BFF's, hanging out and loving the fuck out of one another and playing "find the taint," huh? That shit is worse than a junior high relationship. Real talk.

What cracks me up is how other friends try to play Dr. fucking Phil and start posting comments in support of their very angry friend (grrrrr). Watch out folks because we have a bad ass over here! FYI - you mother fuckers are just as stupid (especially when you don't know the person or the story). But hey, who are we staying out of it, right? That's right, we're the drama free people.

My advice is simple. Start getting in the middle of the posts, call them out and be a complete fucking dick...I guarantee that person will STOP being passive aggressive and airing their dirty laundry. And if they don't stop, just say, "fuck it," and delete them. Why waste your time checking out your latest "news feed" and see 20 posts about your friend talking some shit about a friend you could give two shits about. Shit, that was a lot of shit for one fucking sentence.

Remember kids, it's called FACEBOOK, not CLOTHESLINE, so stop airing your dirty laundry.

You're Welcome. 

Keep it Real,

J-Wunder