Thursday, January 12, 2012

A Tale of Two Vaginas


Every Man's Dream. This chick has a double fun zone! But does she have a taint?

Hazel Jones, a 27-year-old British woman who went on national television to confess that when she was 18 she found out that she has two vaginas! Siamese twat! The vagina has two faces! Twat Falls Idaho! The Lori & Reba of pussies! Etc.. etc...

On ITV's This Morning yesterday (brought to us by esteemed journal of EVERYTHING that is The Daily Mail), Hazel told hosts Holly and Phillip that she went through most of her life with a double the fun coochie and thought all girls had two like her. When she was a teenager, she even asked one of her friends which hole the tampon goes into and the conversation became so damn confusing that she walked away thinking the tampon is supposed to go up her ass. Holly shouldn't be embarrassed about that. Who hasn't as a teenager gotten drunk on the Tia Maria they stole from their mother's secret alcohol stash in the garage and sat on the bathroom toilet thinking what it would be like to have ass sex with a tampon? Who hasn't turned that thought into a reality and quickly realized they shouldn't have pulled that shit (emphasis on that) out and just left it up there for a medical professional to discover twenty years later during a prostate exam. We all have!

Hazel didn't learn that not all ladies have twin twatties until one of her boyfriends pointed it out to her. That must've been a fun conversation. "Um, Hazel, why are two frustrated and unsatisfied baginas frowning at me instead of one?" After Hazel's boyfriend lovingly told her that her chocha looks like a Double Double, she went to the doctor and found out that she's got two vaginas, two uteruses and two cervixes. Hazel also had to lose her virginity twice to really make it count.

Well, it's nice to know that the power of dual vaginas and two servings of uterus fell into the right hands. If it happened to Michelle Duggar, we'd all be fucked and Arkansas would become the new China.

And if you're wondering why Hazel went on television to tell everyone that she's got a double door vagina, wouldn't you?! If I had a no-no-no-no, I'd be shouting it from every TV show. Correction: I don't think I'd be shouting it from every TV show, because I don't think I'd leave me house if I was able to fap with a rubber horseshoe.

via - D Listed

8 comments:

L-Train said...

She's 27 and she's JUST NOW figuring that shit out? I'd have been a fucking millionaire by the time I was 25. You could be a complete skank-a-dank-DANK and STILL be a virgin on your wedding night. #WINNING.

Anonymous said...

I have the same condition and I hate it. It has caused me years of discomfort and has caused me to have 14 miscarriages including the miscarriage of my daughters twin. It has also caused me to not be normal and wear tampons like other women and several years of mis diagnosed medical conditions. I will admit there is some pleasure sexually, but u have to be careful or else it will hurt very bad!!!!

L-Train said...

Anonymous: The Ghetto Genius team thanks you for your comment, and would like to help you. Please send photos. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

It looks normal from the outside. the septum blends in and unless you play with it constantly, it lays to one side, feels normal and looks normal. You cant normally tell anything is different.

Anonymous said...

'If it happened to Michelle Duggar, we'd all be fucked and Arkansas would become the new China.' ......bahahahaha

Anonymous said...

Am I the only one who realizes women don't have prostates?

Rowdy Reign said...

L-Train, you are a hot damn mess.

First anon, thanks for the input.....gladly I only have one that receives MUCH pleasure :)

but yeah this entry was BANANAS!

Anonymous said...

She should do the next double mint commercial fuck Chris brown double the pleasure double the fun