Real Talk

I don't understand the words that are coming out of your mouth

 
So here we are folks...12 hours ago, I got into a Facebook standoff with someone I apparently went to school with back in high school. What I thought was hilarious (along with others) she took as an opportunity to school me on the aspects of whatever the fuck she was trying to prove. The end result -  The bitch got fucking destroyed by the man they call, J-Wundernuts. If you missed this exchange, you can catch it here:

The Hating Game

Now, we all know two things: 1) I'm not even close to being a hateful person, 2) I'm fucking funny (sort of). But how does one person think they can get away with trying to school me, on some shit they have no clue about? One of my readers put it best when she said:

Her posts remind me of a quote from Billy Madison, "What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response, were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

As a blogger, my job is to do the following:

1) Be funny as fuck (or try to be).
2) Give my personal opinion.
3) Be real no matter what any mother fucker thinks, and tell America what they are thinking but not saying.

Three basic principles I have stuck with and never backed away from. Rewind back to yesterday, and up pops the 1,578th person who has an issue with a goddamn link I posted. A picture of two ugly mother fuckers who found love. Funny? You bet your sweet ass it was funny. So funny that over 40 people shared it via Facebook. However, it wasn't funny to lucky #1,578.


Now, I understand everyone is entitled to their own opinion. That's the beauty of living in this country. I don't mind it because I knew going in to being a blogger, I would get heat for a ton of shit I write or post (comes with the territory). However, when you try to bust knowledge on something that doesn't make any fucking sense and is 10,000 times over your head, game over friend. One reason why people read my blog...I'm honest, state facts and tell the truth (sometimes) in a funny and fucked up sort of way. So as the Hamburglar decided to go off "ABC After School Special" style and talk about how hateful and sad I was, as an individual, she made way for me to put on my anaconda choke.


People, it was yesterday's experience that made me realize something. It made me realize that people like Fuck Face Magee who air their dirty laundry on Facebook about how shitty their marriage, life, blah, blah, blah is, are helpless, hopeless and fucking idiots. Look, saying shit once in a while, by all means, have at it. But every fucking day? Get the fuck out of here with that shit. You think anyone wants to hear that? Even your goddamn friends? Anyone that responds back to your issues, guess what? They are just as fucked up as you are or probably worse. Misery loves fucking company. No one has to explain shit to me and tell me why their life is so great. Do you know by doing that, everyone knows that your life fucking sucks? Not sure how some people can bitch about how shitty their life is but go out of their way to tell me their life is absolutely FANTASTIC! Please. I don't need explanations on what makes your pussy tingle. Why? Because I don't care.


There's no secret that some people either love or hate my blog. The funny truth is, the haters, keep on reading. It's like a bad car accident that you want to turn away from but can't. Why? Because you want to see what I'm going to say next. And if you're all wondering if Snuffaluffagus is reading this column, of course she is. Only because she wants to know if I'm still talking shit. <here's me waving at you talking shit and grabbing my balls hater>...I write because people actually have a good sense of humor and enjoy laughing. But in Super Haters case, a sense of humor and backbone are non-fucking-existent. Calling me hateful is like saying my dick is 8 inches long. Completely untrue.


Haters are going to hate and I'm gonna keep writing. Whatever the fuck I want. Whenever the fuck I want. No one said you have to read my shit, but you choose to. I win, you lose. 


To my blog faithful...I appreciate the love and support. Keep spreading my shit like herpes. I'm out.