2010 Year End Review

As the final hours of 2010 approach us, I thought it would only be right, to give everyone my thoughts and feelings about some of the things that caught my attention this past year.


It was a goddamn tornado of shit...what can I say.  From Lady GaGa sporting Flank Steak as a fucking dress, to Tiger Woods sinkin' putts and crushin' sluts - 2010 has given every one of us something to laugh about.







Antoine Dodson went from a very flamboyant crack head, to a goddamn overnight super star because his sister almost got raped while everyone was home.  Word of this got out and a bunch of funny ass white dudes decided to make the local news report of this crime a fucking auto tune classic on YouTube. Cracked-out to Cashed-out.  Lucky sonofabitch.

How bout that glittery ass bitch Ke$ha?  Never thought someone could sell so many singles by acting like a fucking slut, while wearing tons of glitter, smelling like a $2 stripper and singing like she has a serious fucking stuttering problem.  There are only so many damn times you can hear those lyrics "har-har-har-har-har-hard" and "young young y-y-y-young."  Every fucking song sounds the same and it gives me a damn headache.  I swear all this broad sings about is drinking, fucking and dancing.



Lets not forget about the blockbuster hit Twilight.  Two words:  Fuck that.  Three more words: Vampires aren't real.  How this movie made millions of female teeny-boppers and women stand in line for two days, leaves me fucking clueless and speechless.  And that whole Team Edward bullshit?  Really?  The mother fucker looks like an albino vampire.  I.Just.Don't.Get.It. You wanna watch a vampire movie, watch The Lost Boys.

What about the Season Finale of Lost?  Thank god that shit is finally over.  How could people say they loved a show that no one, even God, couldn't fucking understand.  Look, when I watch something, I expect to enjoy it.  It should have a goddamn storyline.  Don't make the shit a confusing ass puzzle where I have to sit and think about shit then reflect on life.  Watching that show was like taking a fucking pop quiz every Wednesday night.  



Brett Favre sending dick pics to that front office slut from the Jets.  Good 'ol #4 must have read my column or something.  In all seriousness though, what was that dude thinking?  "No one will find out if I send two side profiles and an aerial shot of my cock?  No one."  Guess again Wrinkled Balls Magee.  You're the oldest living NFL player man.  Too many blows to your head must have given you that syndrome they call stupid.  I know you're the man but buddy, keep your old ass cock in your pants. 

The Amazing Watermelon on the Amazing Race.  One word: OUCH!

Bieber fucking fever!  How does a kid that doesn't have any hair on his sack get this much attention?  This much love?  I mean, I've seen video's of girls crying over this little fucker.  Is his cock really that big or am I missing something?  The only thing this kid is good for is his flamboyant shiny hair.  Other than that, I would love to slap the shit out of this kid multiple times in an alley way.  Don't get me wrong, I dig that song, "Baby, Baby, Baby" but fuck, this shit is getting a little out of hand with all this Bieber fever bullshit.  I guess we can thank Usher for discovering his scrawny little ass.  Thanks a lot fucker.  We'll see if I ever buy one of your R&B albums again.  Dick.   

The Most Interesting Man in the World.  I want to be the Dos Equis guy.  I want to sleep with the chicks he sleeps with.  Wear the suits he fucking wears.  Talk with whatever accent he talks with.  Never did I think that a 100 year old man could be so fucking pimp and make James Bond look like a little sissy bitch.  I go to Mexican Restaurants twice a week, just so I can drink a Dos Equis and feel like I am special.  Like my cock has extra Machismo and girls will want to talk to me.  Damn you and cheers mother fucking Dos Equis guy!  Not only did you make that fucking beer that much more delicious but, you have made men like myself believe that if you act as cool as you do, when you turn 100 years old, you will still have the ability to bang chicks that are in their 20's.  Bad.Ass.Pimp.



That's my two cents on some of the things that caught my eye in 2010.  Lets hope for a rockin', jaw dropping, mother fucking poppin' 2011!  Cheers!